October 30th
sometimes I feel so alive I could be dead.
sometimes I feel so alive I could be dead.
like some how the blood coursing through me is actually only saltwater and I’m actually some weirdly shaped wave that’s just waiting to crash and wash over some dirty spot on the sidewalk at school.
sometimes I feel so alone that I’m claustrophobic.
sometimes I feel so alone that I’m claustrophobic.
like the air around me is actually full of tons of people waiting until to hurt me or to be hurt because that’s all humans can honestly do to eachother.
sometimes I feel so young that I grow old.
like somehow I am burdened and aged by the fact I know and have lived so much less than I want.
sometimes I feel so cold that I’m burning.
sometimes I feel so cold that I’m burning.
like the rain is actually little bits of fire spreading on my skin and setting flame to the old body, just leaving the new, tender skin of my real self.
sometimes sometimes sometimes.
more like all the time.
sometimes sometimes sometimes.
more like all the time.
all the time I feel dead, claustrophobic, old, and burning.
like somehow I’m going to be fine because I’m just as much of a mess as everyone I know.
that’s all.
the end.
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